Author note: This is my entry for the On The Job Challenge 2025.
“It is way too nice outside to be stuck in the office today,” I complained when I got to work, hanging my bag on the back of my desk chair.
Lorraine liked an early start so was already firmly ensconced at the adjacent desk. “It’s moving day, remember?” she reminded me, not looking away from her screen.
“Oh, crap, of course.”
Lorraine gave me a sidelong glance. “Forgetful Keira strikes again.”
“I’m not forgetful,” I replied automatically, although most of the evidence said otherwise. I did have a good memory, just not for dates and events.
I’d left the computer on standby the night before, so when I jiggled the mouse it woke up and, when I’d put in the password, it lit up with everything I’d left open.
“Oh hell, I’d forgotten about this Ronald Cook stuff,” I groaned, putting my head in my hands. “And today’s the deadline.”
Lorraine looked over my shoulder, curious. “What’s the issue, again?”
“More like: what isn’t the issue? Emergency tax code, he’s owed back pay and pay in lieu of holiday, he wants to pause payments into the share scheme while his pension arrangements get sorted… Argh. I can’t make it reconcile.”
“Payroll: it’s supposed to be easy,” Lorraine said, laughing to herself. “Listen, these kind of things are what Charlie lives for. Send it over to him and he’ll crack it in ten minutes, I bet.”
“You think? I don’t want to bother him with it; makes it look like I can’t do my job,” I said uncertainly.
“He’d probably be more annoyed if you didn’t send it to him, honestly.”
I thought about this. Lorraine was right, as usual. Charlie was the new manager of our little team and he did like a challenge.
“I’ll send it to him after I get coffee,” I announced, pushing my chair back and getting up. “Want anything?”
Lorraine already had her bright pink polkadot mug on her desk, and she peered into it. “Might as well. Coffee, if you please.”
Before I set off for the kitchen, I re-tied my ponytail since it had come loose driving here in the car. It was too warm to have my hair down, and I thought it looked cute with my short-sleeved blouse and knee-length skirt. I used the camera on my phone to briefly examine my dark chestnut hair and make sure I hadn’t missed a bit.
“Stop preening and get my drink, girl,” Lorraine demanded.
“Don’t be so impatient,” I gently scolded her. “Good things come to those who wait.”
Before I could go anywhere, the door to the office opened and our boss walked in. He’d only been the manager for about four months, but we already all liked him. Well, not quite. Lorraine, Amanda and I liked him. Tina, the fourth member of the team, didn’t like him, but she didn’t like anything. He was tall, slim and an intellectual type, but he was really approachable and friendly. He was the complete opposite of the previous manager, who we’d called Shit-Face Barbara. The nickname was because her two main facial expressions were, according to Lorraine, ‘either the face you make when you’re taking a shit, or the face you make when you step in shit’, which was surprisingly apt. She’d always been a miserable old bitch, so naturally she and Tina had got on well.
“Good morning ladies,” Charlie announced, running a hand through his pushed-back blonde hair. “Coffee’s here.”
Lorraine instantly pricked up her ears. “Coffee? To give us energy for this move?”
“Fresh from J’s Cafe,” Charlie confirmed, putting the cardboard carrier down on his desk. “Let me see if I got the order right. Lorraine: black Americano, extra bitterness, extra black.”
“Did you remember to ask for extra caffeine?” Lorraine asked, keeping a straight face.
Charlie nodded. “Yes, I quite definitely asked Jack behind the counter to just make yours with pure caffeine.”
“How did he take that?” Lorraine laughed.
“Face like granite, as usual. Keira, cappuccino, no chocolate, oat milk.”
“Perfect,” I said, smiling.
Lorraine nudged me. “Teacher’s pet,” she muttered.
“I asked Jack to milk the oats extra gently,” he said, smirking at me.
“Now I know you didn’t do that, because he’d ban you from the cafe for that,” Lorraine said smartly.
“You’re right. It’s strange: Jack is always perfectly polite, but yet if someone told me he’d done a ten year stretch for armed robbery, I wouldn’t be surprised.”
“That’s why he’s so attractive. Mysterious and dangerous. Women love that in a man,” Lorraine said.
“Must be why I’m single, then. Straightforward and harmless. Anyway, I got Amanda green tea, I know that’s what she always has,” Charlie said, bringing over the cardboard cups for Lorraine and I.
“Three out of four. Just Tina to go,” I said, thanking him for the coffee.
“Now, she’s the tricky one. I got a white Americano, but I am pretty sure that’s wrong.”
“Don’t bother asking forgetful Keira,” Lorraine said, prising the lid off her drink and blowing on it.
“I’m not forgetful!”
“So is it white Americano, fatih escort or…?”
Lorraine looked up at him. “It’s a trick question. Whatever you get for Tina she’ll have a problem with.”
“Ah, yes. Well, if she doesn’t like it, I’ll drink it.”
He put the other two drinks on Amanda’s and Tina’s desks and then strolled off to the kitchen. I dashed after him.
“Charlie, um, today’s the deadline for the Ronald Cook stuff,” I said, watching him put his lunch in the fridge.
“Oh, that’s right. Did you manage to sort it out? Or are you waiting for something from me?” he asked. He was wearing a white shirt, no tie, with the sleeves rolled up, and up close I could see a dark patch of skin on the inside of his forearm. It felt like a weirdly intimate thing to notice.
“Um, I didn’t sort it out. Any chance I can send it over to you to have a look? I can’t make it reconcile and maybe you’ll spot something I haven’t.”
He looked at me and nodded. “Of course. I’ll make a bit of time this morning before the big move gets into full swing.”
“Thank you; I really appreciate it.” I felt relieved.
“Don’t worry about it. Worst case, Ron will blow his top and I’ll say it was Tina dealing with it.”
I laughed, covering my mouth.
“Oops, forget I said that,” he said, laughing nervously. “I treat all of my team equally.”
“Thanks, Charlie.” I headed back to my desk, almost bumping into Amanda when she came through the door.
“Morning, Keira,” she said cheerfully. “It’s bloody warm out there. I’m sweating like a pig.”
“Nothing new there for you, Mandy,” Lorraine called out, and Amanda rolled her eyes at me.
“Charlie brought hot drinks,” I said, gesturing towards the cup on Amanda’s desk.
“Ooh, lovely. He’s a sweetheart, isn’t he?” she said happily, pulling out her chair.
“Who is?” Charlie asked as he came back into the room.
“You are, Charlie,” Lorraine said briskly as I sat back down, opening up my email and gathering the information for Ronald Cook’s pay so I could send it to Charlie.
“That’s very kind of you, Lorraine,” he said, sounding genuinely pleased.
“Can I have a pay rise now, please?”
He laughed. “Free coffee not enough, Lorraine?”
The door opened again and Tina came in, carrying her coat under her arm.
“Hello, Tina,” I said and she waved briefly at me, making a beeline for her desk.
“What’s this?” she asked, eyeing the coffee cup on her desk.
“I got coffee from J’s cafe. It’s a white Americano; sorry if that’s not right,” Charlie said to her.
She looked down at it, unimpressed. “It’s too hot for coffee today,” she said, hanging her coat on her chair.
Charlie caught my eye and I tried not to laugh.
Tina eventually shed her coat when Charlie suggested we have the morning meeting outside on one of the lunch tables instead of sitting indoors.
“Once we’ve done whatever work we’ve got on this morning, we need to pack up everything we want to take to the new office,” Charlie said, reading off a sticky note. “Anything left here will get thrown out.”
“The main thing is probably moving all those folders in the archive,” Amanda said. She’d worked here the longest of anyone and was de facto in charge of what needed to move. “There’s masses of them and they’re heavy.”
“Do we need to keep them all?” Charlie asked.
“We need seven years’ worth. Beyond that, old Shit-Face used to get us to keep them in the past, but I haven’t checked for years.”
“I’ll call someone in head office and see what they say,” Charlie told her, making a note. “Someone from IT is coming to take the computers; the furniture all stays here, but please check you haven’t left anything in the kitchen.”
“How are we handling the transfer?” Lorraine asked. “Are we all going at once, or are we staggering it?”
“I’ll stay behind and you can all go ahead. When you’re all set up and we know there’s no major issues, I’ll do a final tidy up and come over then,” Charlie said. “Well, maybe two of us should stay. Any volunteers?”
There was no initial enthusiasm. “I’ll stay,” I said, shrugging. It hardly made any difference.
“Thanks, Keira,” Charlie said, and Lorraine stood on my foot. I ignored her.
“I think that summarises it. Anyone have anything for me?” he asked.
“I emailed you the Ronald Cook files,” I told him.
He nodded. “Perfect, thanks. I’ll prioritise that after the meeting.”
“Can we just stay outside in the sunshine all day?” Amanda asked, grinning.
“Amanda, you know if we could I’d already be on a sun lounger,” Charlie said, looking up at the warm sun. “Pina coladas and swimming shorts all the way.”
“Pina coladas taste better on the beach,” Lorraine said.
“Well, after the office move you’ll be what, a mile closer to the beach?” Charlie replied.
“Perfect. No longer a hundred miles: now just ninety-nine.”
“Don’t say I never do anything for you. Okay, is that everything? Otherwise we can get back to work,” çapa escort Charlie said, looking around. Nobody said anything, so he was the first to get up. Just before he went inside, he pointed at me.
“Ronald Cook: do you think he’s related to Captain Cook?”
I smiled. “No idea. Maybe?”
“Because I’d love to send him to the other side of the world on a boat.”
Lorraine walked past. “How long did it take you to come up with that?” she teased.
“How long have I been here today? An hour? That long,” Charlie said. “What can I say: I’m a quick wit.”
It really had been warm outside, and whilst it was still just about cool enough in the morning to be bearable, it had just begun to reach the stage of being too hot. I was thirsty when I went back inside, enjoying the cooler air, and I wasn’t surprised when Lorraine was also on her way to the kitchen.
“Tea, Keira?” she asked, filling the kettle.
“I’m gasping, actually. The sun was on my back the whole meeting and this blouse is only thin, so I reckon I’m going to have a tan line from my bra strap,” I told her, looking at my arms to see if they’d instantly turned to a lovely golden colour. Strangely enough they were the same pink colour they’d been when I went out.
Lorraine threw teabags into mugs. “You’re really being a suck-up, today,” she said, giving me a look. “If Charlie asked you to jump off a bridge, you’d be diving into the canal in a heartbeat.”
“I’m just being nice,” I replied, rising above her petty comments. “Anyway, imagine if Shit-Face had been coordinating this move. She’d have been screaming at us by now.”
“True. God, I’m glad she’s gone. Nobody ever deserved a promotion more than her,” Lorraine said, leaning against a counter. “But don’t change the subject. You know what I reckon?”
I looked suspiciously at her. “What?”
She dropped her voice. “I think you fancy the boss.”
If I could have rolled my eyes harder, I would have. “So now if I do someone a favour, I fancy them?”
“I’m just saying: you’re not denying it.”
“Here I am denying it. I don’t fancy him.” I glanced at the door, suddenly paranoid, but there was nobody there.
“Ah, see, you wouldn’t need to deny it if it wasn’t true,” Lorraine said, turning away when the kettle finished boiling.
“I didn’t realise we were ten years old having a playground argument,” I replied.
“Keira, we’ve been having a playground argument since your first day here. That’s my level. It’s all I’m capable of,” Lorraine said, laughing. “You want oat milk, right?”
“I think there’s still some in the fridge.”
She retrieved it and poured a splash into my mug. “Anyway, being serious for a second: Charlie is quite fit. I’m surprised he’s single.”
I gasped. “Lorraine! You’re fifty, you can’t make comments like that.”
“It’s precisely because I’m fifty that I can make comments like that,” she retorted. “In any case, I’m right, aren’t I?”
“Well, I suppose. He definitely doesn’t seem like the type to be single.”
“Amanda and I fancy the pants off him and despite what you say, I’m sure you do too. So that’s three potential girlfriends right there.”
“Amanda’s married,” I reminded her.
“Good point. Two girlfriend options, then.” She handed me my cup of tea.
“I mean, if he asked you… would you go on a date with him?” I asked, intrigued.
“Absolutely not. I’m almost twice his age, Keira. What a suggestion.” She tutted.
“You were the one who-“
She laughed wickedly. “I’d let him fuck me, though.”
“Lorraine!”
“Oh what, like you wouldn’t?”
I giggled. “I suppose I would. He is really hot. If he can sort out Ronald then I’d let him fuck me in the arse.”
Lorraine was just beginning to look suitably scandalised when the door opened and we both spun around, startled.
“Keira, I was just looking at this Ronald Cook thing and wondered if you had a second?” Charlie asked.
“Yes! Of course,” I squeaked, horribly aware of what he might have just overheard. His expression was totally professional and if he had heard something, he showed absolutely no sign of it. But still, I was cursing myself (and Lorraine) as I trailed after him to his desk.
It turned out that Lorraine was right. When Charlie got stuck into the enigma that was Ronald Cook, he did manage to sort it out. We even got an email back from the man himself thanking us for sorting it out.
“Always good when one works out,” Charlie said, leaning back in his chair and stretching before pushing his hand through his hair. “Right, time to move some heavy archive boxes. You coming?”
“I’ll leave that to you and Amanda,” I said, getting a groan from him. I left, taking my empty mug with me back to my desk, and almost walked straight into Lorraine’s expectant gaze.
“I don’t want to hear it,” I hissed, knowing exactly what was coming.
“You know you have to let him do it, now,” Lorraine replied, smirking.
“Shut up about it.”
“Oh, I am the very güngören escort model of discretion,” she said. “Bum’s the word with me. Sorry, I mean mum.”
I could feel my cheeks beginning to burn. “Lorraine…”
“I’ll stop. I need to finish my tea before it goes completely cold, anyway. Bottoms up.”
I rested my head on the desk. The only glimmer of hope against Lorraine’s gleeful teasing was the fact that soon she would be leaving for the new office.
In the end, Amanda was so efficient at knowing what needed to be packed to go and what didn’t that it took half as long as expected. The IT bloke turned up with a van and said he was in a rush, so everyone had to close down their work and let him work his magic with the wires and screens. Amanda, Tina and Lorraine departed shortly after him for the new place, leaving just Charlie and I and a sea of unwanted paperwork.
“How far back does this stuff go?” he asked, peering into the top of a dusty box. “This is financial year 1986.”
I looked in another box. “1993.”
“You know head office said we need to shred all of this?” Charlie said, and my heart sank.
“We’ll be here a thousand years trying to shred it all,” I said. “These boxes are all nearly full.”
“Okay, new plan,” he said, closing the box up. “We put all these in my car. I’ll take them home and burn them in the garden at the weekend. Nobody will know unless you tell them.”
He fixed me with an intense look so I mimed zipping my mouth closed.
“Perfect. Now you’re implicated,” he said, grinning. “Give me a hand loading them up.”
It really was not the day to be hauling heavy boxes around outside in the hot sun. Luckily, Charlie realised this and instead of making me sweat through my blouse, I moved the boxes from the office to the front door and he went outside with them. We made an efficient team and the room looked a lot tidier when we were finally done.
“Right,” he said, putting his hands on his hips after wiping his face with an old tea-towel from the kitchen. “I think that’s everything in here.”
“What about a final cup of tea while we sort out the kitchen?” I suggested.
“Best idea I’ve heard all day,” Charlie said, smiling at me and making me blush slightly. “I’ll make the tea, you sort out everything else.”
“That doesn’t sound fair,” I said, knowing he was teasing me as we walked through to the kitchen, site of my earlier shame.
“Actually it’s called effective delegation of responsibility. You learn it at manager training camp.”
I could sense a punchline coming so I ignored him and began filling the kettle.
“Don’t you want to ask about manager training camp?” he asked.
“Not in the least.”
“Well that’s me told.”
Once I’d made the tea, we put our mugs on the counter and surveyed the rest of the kitchen.
“I really don’t fancy clearing out the fridge,” I said, eyeing it and the suspicious orange stain that had been spreading along the bottom for the past week.
“If I do the fridge, you do all the cupboards?” Charlie suggested.
“Hmm. That sounds fair.”
He held out his hand and we shook on it.
“Just throw everything straight into the bin unless you really think we should keep it,” he told me, opening the fridge wide.
“Got it.” I definitely had the easy job: the cupboards were mainly empty now, apart from the occasional loose lid for a long-forgotten takeaway tub or a chipped mug nobody was willing to claim. Charlie was making noises of disgust as he approached the bowels of the fridge, making me smile.
“I’m learning things about you ladies I really didn’t want to know,” he said, extracting an unmarked plastic bag with something wet in it. “What on earth is this?”
“I think it’s from Amanda’s zero-waste phase. Might be fish stock?” I wondered aloud. “She was forever reusing plastic bags like that.”
“Well, it’s waste now,” he said, dropping it into the bin. “Aha, there’s the source of the orange stain. Looks like soup… maybe carrot?”
Leaving him to it, I carried on with the cupboards. The main food cupboard needed work, clearing out ten nearly-finished cereal boxes and a giant sack of porridge oats that expired four years ago. Behind that I found a jar of something and had to go on tiptoes to drag it out.
“Oh, here it is!” I said when I realised what it was.
“What’s that?” Charlie asked, his arm reaching deep into the fridge.
“Organic virgin coconut oil. I bought this because it’s supposed to be healthier than other types of oil, but then it disappeared literally the day I brought it in. I thought Tina had stolen it, but it must have got knocked behind the sack of oats by accident.”
“Looks delicious,” Charlie said, eyeing the jar. “Doesn’t it make everything taste of coconut?”
“Well, I don’t know, do I? I never opened it.”
“Put it on your desk and you can take it to the new kitchen if it’s unopened,” he suggested.
When I got back from that, he’d cleared out the entire fridge and was vigorously washing his hands.
“I think that’s all the cupboards,” I said, double-checking one or two of them.
“What about the dishwasher?” he asked.
“Amanda sorted it out earlier.”
“Are we taking the kettle?”
We both looked at it.
“What if I say it broke in transit and the company pays for a shiny new one?” Charlie suggested.